paulyoptosaurus:

trying to put my bedsheets on by myself is like wrestling with satan

ciggers:

i only succeed in failing 

REBLOG | Posted 1 day ago With 55,409 notes

imawalkingtravestyy:

i wanna lie on the floor and not think for a month or two.

fartgallery:

readingaroundthemovies:

fartgallery:

i need to date a girl with the initials AG so we can carve SW+AG on benches

Those r my mums initials…,

say hello to your new dad. i see that your tumblr blog contains some vulgar language. you’re grounded

feat:

”are they ignoring me or did their message just fail to send” - a novel by me 

politedoge:

when you’re in a group project and you’re the only one doing work

image

homudokas:

do you ever feel like a plastic swag

REBLOG | Posted 1 day ago With 78,925 notes

fivestupidboys:

having a really good joke but executing it poorly

image

dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

teamrocketing:

*knocks you out with a calculator* bet you weren’t counting on that

dekutree:

tbh I don’t see the fuss about having waiters/waitresses not being happy and enthusiastic like I came here to eat I didn’t come here to be amused by employees as long as I’m getting my food and they’re not being blatantly rude I don’t see why y’all need to go on yelp to rank a restaurant 0/5 and have an outburst on why your waitress didn’t smile at you when she poured you water

REBLOG | Posted 1 day ago With 38,749 notes

flatsound:

i wanna feel how dogs feel when you let them go in a big field 

pimpdaddytavros:

i want to be rebellious but i dont want to get in trouble  

creative-munchies:

Favourite work of the week, amazing food photography with a space narrative twist!

Endless Books: 8 Weeks
- Dina Belenko

REBLOG | Posted 1 day ago With 26,614 notes